Christmas time is here... almost.

It's almost December!!! EEE! While I have been in full Christmas mode for well over a month now, I understand that not everyone shares in that with me. Therefore, I can be excited that all you Grinches who do not celebrate until Dec 1st will soon join me in rockin' the Christmas spirit ; )

The past 7 weeks have been quite full and it's hard to pick out the details to share. I was able to spend a wonderful week in Bugnay near the end of October. It was fun, relaxing, and a good break from the norm. I always look forward to my time spent there. The weekend I got home all the staff and volunteers at the clinic had the opportunity to do a shoulder dystocia (a complication in birth resulting from the baby's shoulders getting stuck somewhere in the pelvis) workshop with Gail Tully (www.spinningbabies.com). Gail is a very respected midwife who specializes in "spinning" babies into optimal positions for birth, as well as techniques to resolve shoulder dystocias. We first watched a workshop video, in which our hearts all stopped as it showed a dystocia that was over 6 minutes, and then had a Skype call with Gail the next evening to ask any questions. It was such a great learning experiences and we were all thankful that Gail was so willing to share her wisdom with us.

Shock, awe, and nervous laughter while watching a VERY long dystocia.

Life continues to be filled with amazing moms, adorable babies, and jamming my brain full of as much information as possible. I honestly feel like the more I learn, the less I know. My great friend and now certified midwife, Aisling, says that's a great place to be - that it keeps us humble as midwives. I sure hope she's right ;) I do find though, that the more I see and learn, the more hungry I am to continue learning. I'm pretty thankful for that fact.

Besides all the learning, I'd have to be honest and say that I've been struggling quite a bit. I don't say that to evoke pity from anyone, instead I just ask for your prayers. I LOVE my life here and have nothing to complain about, at all! However, that hasn't changed the fact that I have been feeling so emotionally exhausted. I'm sure you can all relate to that feeling. I've come to the place more than a few times where I feel like I have nothing to give, no words to say, and no energy to put into anyone or anything. I've felt empty and unable to refill. Thankfully, I serve and am loved by a great God who does that refilling for me and is right there in the midst of any struggle. I am in a place where I want to be able to pour God's love into the awesome women I am around, and your prayers that I would continually be able to do that would be so appreciated!

And to add something really important to that prayer list...
Meet MJ!

My amazing continuity patient delivered this adorable little guy last week. Before I tell you more about him, let me just brag for a minute about his mom. MJ decided to make is appearance a little bit "late" so we were in the position of needing to try a bunch of techniques to get labor progressing. His mom was amazing! Her and I had quite the fun time walking up and down stairs, and up and down again, and again... Not gonna lie - my legs were sore!
In the wee hours of the morning, we welcomed MJ to the world. He was born with a complete cleft lip and palate. As you can imagine, this poses some breast feeding challenges. While he is able to breastfeed a little bit, he is not able to get as much milk as he needs from the breast on his own. Amazingly, Georgia had a connection to a clinic in Manila who had just received some donations. Included in those donations was a special bottle made for babies with clefts. This clinic sent up the bottle as well as a breast pump for MJs mom to keep. The picture is MJ trying the bottle for the first time. He did so well!! His mom and I were very proud. I'm so thrilled to report that MJ is now gaining weight and so far has been a very healthy little guy. I'd love it if you could keep him and his mom in your prayers. Please pray that she would feel loved and supported as she faces these special challenges, and that MJ would continue to gain weight and remain healthy!

The past week has blessed me with two other adorable babies born to awesome Momma's! :)
It's hard not to love what you do when you are surrounded by these little ones...



RJ



Chad Beau

That's all for tonight! Thanks for reading :)
Oh, and to my American friends, Happy Thanksgiving!!

Much love,
A


Letting go...

Happy Belated Thanksgiving to my Canadian Peeps!

I hope you all had a great weekend celebrating with family and/or friends and were able to indulge in some pumpkin pie. Maybe even with vanilla ice cream. Mmmm.

Life has been pretty great over here on the other side of the world. Us few Canadians (plus the other Americanos!)cooked up some traditional-ish food and we enjoyed a meal together with the Abundant family. It's hard to be away from home during holidays, but I am so thankful for the laughter and hilarity that fills my home here. It makes everything much easier.

A constant theme in my life over the past 6 weeks has been this idea of letting go. And let me tell you... I'm not very good at it. I am a champ at clinging to things that I have no control over, mulling over situations in my head for days, letting my mind wander to all the possible scenarios that could happen if things don't go exactly how I would like them too, etc... You would think that I would have learned this lesson over the years of always having to LET GO, but nope. My thick skull takes work, but God keeps on going with the lessons. Let go and Let God, right?

Yesterday was one of those lessons. I was on morning shift, as per usual on Wednesday's, and was excited when a labor came in around 7:30am. She was such a gem and was working through contractions really well. Unfortunately, her blood pressure was quite high. Over the next few hours we tried everything we could to stabilize the BP. It would stabilize for a while, and then jump right back up. Through this all, she labored beautifully and was such a joy to work with. Eventually, we had to make the decision to transport her to the hospital. I hugely dislike transporting. I think all midwives do. But there are some cases where labor jumps outside the realm of normal, and we have to let go. Whether we want to or not, we have to make these decisions. I don't want to let go. I don't want those patients to have to go somewhere else. I want to be able to change the circumstance. I want to have more control. But I don't, and I can't. So I must let go. I have to trust that God is taking care of the situation better than I ever could and that He will continue to do so whether at Abundant or at the hospital. And he did. This morning I was able to go visit a beautiful little 3.4kg baby girl, born to my patient about three hours after we transported her. Mom and baby are doing very well!

The lessons of letting go don't stop with clinic work, but roll over into so many areas of my life it seems. But that's ok. I know that God is in control and that I can do very little by clinging to things with my little (but strong!) fists.

Next week I am heading up to the clinic in Bugnay... and I am so excited! I get to hang out with the awesome folks up there, hike up into some other villages, do well-woman appointments, and enjoy the mountain air. I will bring back some stories and pictures to share.

In the meantime, I'd love to share some prayer requests with you!

• For the clinic, as always. I am SO blessed to be a part of this amazing ministry here and love to see it prosper.
• For our patients - health for moms and babies.
• It is almost time to begin fundraising for my LAST semester. Yes, LAST. Crazy, eh? I will need to raise another $8,000 to finish out my time here. It will be due Feb 1st. Prayer for provision would be amazing!

Love you all!! Thanks for reading!

A

Adjustments

Hi Friends,

I'm sitting here in my room watching a crazy lightening storm (and a few episodes of Friends) and relaxing before night shift, so it seems like a pretty good time to write a quick update. I've had a ton of things that I have wanted to blog about in the past month, but haven't yet been able to put the proper words to my thoughts, so I just haven't blogged any words... Maybe those thoughts will come together in time.

August was a month of adjustments for me here. Adjusting to the heat again, getting used to always being sweaty and the amount of water to drink to avoid constant headaches, adjusting to my favourite Irish Aisling leaving, thus making Edolbina and I the second years (yikes!), getting in the swing of assignments and clinic work again, and adjusting again to being so far from Canada. I struggled a lot in the first weeks back, wishing that the places and people I love were much closer to each other, but that's not the reality. So in the meantime, I will embrace where I am at, knowing that in just over a year it is going to be my lovely home here that I am missing in the same way that I miss Canada now.

I came across a quote today that pretty clearly explained the way I feel... I wish I could have put it into words like this myself, but someone else did the trick nicely.

"You will never be completely at home again, because part of your heart will

always be elsewhere. That is the price you pay for the richness

 of loving and knowing people in more than one place."

 

In other news - gosh I'm so happy to be back to baby catching! I missed the moms, the bellies, and the baby's while I was in Canada. Every day I feel so fortunate to be here, doing what I love and have dreamed of for years! As this year goes on, I would so appreciate if you would keep me in your prayers. Pray for the clinic, for the patients we see every day, for the babies we help welcome into the world, and for the amazing midwives I get to work with.

Oh! and please enjoy the fall for me!!!! I have been dreaming of wearing sweaters, scarves, and boots. Strange? Maybe. But I would say pretty typical for a fall/winter girl living in an endless summer.

 

 

Much love,

A



Home in the Phils

After a few long days of travel, I finally made it back to Tabuk! And I am so thrilled to be back.
Jet lag is currently taking over and I am seeing hours of the morning that I only wish to see when there is the promise of a new baby, but I am sure in a couple days my body will settle into normal routine here again. I am loving the familiarity of the heat, reliance on a fan, the sound of Filipino tv shows, and the excitement that the first of the month brings faster internet.:)

It is often surreal thinking about being back for second year, and that the next time I come home, I will be finished this program. Crazy! Last year flew by, and everyone says second year goes by even faster. While the appeal of home (of the Canadian kind) makes me wish the time will fly, my love for this place begs for the time to stand still. After a couple years of constant countdowns it seems, I've decided that this will be a year of no countdowns. I even deleted my countdown app ;) I intend to enjoy this year in it's fullness, making the most of the time and experiences I have here knowing that God has brought me here for a purpose. I can't wait to share the stories of second year with you!

As I write this, the sun has just risen on August 1st. The day my next set of clinic fees are due. As it stands I am still $1,500 away from meeting that goal. A daunting number maybe, especially considering the day. However, it's not an impossible number. There is nothing impossible about this. I have seen that to be true time after time, and I know that provision and faithfulness will continue. Will you pray with me to see that provision?

Before I go, I'd like to explain to you a little bit about these clinic fees. Tuition comes along with being a student, right? Not here. Instead, our "tuition" is in the form of clinic fees. These fees that are paid on Aug 1st and Feb 1st of every year in the program go towards sustaining the clinic that I volunteer and am trained at. It's actually pretty cool how it works. Each time a birth happens, I am able to see these finances at work. These fees help the clinic to run smoothly and ensure that we can continue to provide excellent midwifery care to the women of Tabuk and surrounding areas, while practically sharing the love of Christ with them.

I'd love if you would prayerfully consider partnering with me in this! That can be done by clicking the Donate button to the right, or, if you have questions about alternate donation methods please e-mail me at pagnucco.alexandra@gmail.com. Your monthly or one-time donation, whether $30 or $300 goes far towards seeing these goals met!


Thanks for reading!
A

Almost there...

5 days till I get to jump on a plane to a place I've been missing lots!
Until then, I am enjoying my last few visits with some pretty amazing people :)

My recent 30 hour drive west to Calgary (my last stop in Canada) gave me some much needed time think about the year ahead. While I am in a much different place heading back as I was when I first went, there are some things that are still fresh on my mind. Last year I stepped into this completely green in so many ways. I had never seen a birth. I had never been around a laboring woman. I had never lived in a foreign country. I had never needed to trust God so much to provide financially. I felt ill-equipped and empty handed. You'd think I'd be done with feeling that as I step into my second year, but apparently that isn't the case. What has changed though, is the perspective that God has given me in regards to that. I had the chance to share a bit of this perspective when I was back in Kamloops, but haven't spoken much of it since. Bear with me as I explain.

I have had the joy of learning over the past year, that no matter how ill-equipped or empty handed I am, God never sees me as such. When thinking about this, the story of Jesus feeding the 5,000 came to mind. When you read this story in John 6 it talks about how Philip, when Jesus asks him "Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?", responds rather incredulously that "it would take more than half a year's wages to buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!". He's feeling pretty empty handed at this point I'm guessing. Then Andrew pipes up to say "Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?". They are not even close to equipped to handle this crowd. But you know what is really awesome? Jesus never looked at this situation and felt empty handed. He is the one who fills the hands. He is the one who equips. All he asked is that his disciples would be obedient in following him and in that, they became part of a freakin awesome miracle. He filled my hands and equipped me to get through my first year, and as I go into this second year, I know he will continue to do so. I find a lot of encouragement, and quite honestly, relief in this fact! Maybe you will too...


Before I began my trip home 8 weeks ago, I was in the position of needing $8,000 in clinic fees and very minimal expenses to continue working and training in the Philippines for the next 6 months. The clinic fees go directly towards ensuring that our patients can receive excellent midwifery care while also being shown the love of God by practically being his hands and feet in their time of need. Practically loving women through midwifery care has a greater impact than I ever could have imagined, and it is such a privilege to be a part of this. I am now in the final stretches, needing only $1,930 more to meet the goal! Seeing this provision is something that constantly amazes me. I know that God is faithful and that he will provide, but it doesn't take away the awe of it when it actually happens.
If you are interested in partnering with me in this, you can click the Donate button to the right. Whether monthly or one-time support, every bit makes a huge difference! Please contact me if you have any questions!

Much love,
A

It's that time again...

The goodbyes have started, quite sadly.

Besides saying goodbye to my wonderful friends in Kamloops, the past few days marked the start of the hugs, the tears, the "see you later's", and "the time will go by so fast!". I know the time will go by so fast. It already has. Yet, there is still a sting in having to say goodbye to friends and family. In the same breath, the closer I get to being back in my own bed in the Philippines, the more excited I am. It's a strange thing having so much of your heart in two very different places.

Over the past couple weeks, it has been absolutely amazing to see provision of finances continually come. There are few words to say besides, God is so good and Thank you! To the people who have supported me, whether prayerfully or financially, I am beyond appreciative. It is because of your generosity that I am able to continue the work and training in the wonderful little place of Tabuk. I am so excited to be able to go back, connect with my past patients, and care for new ones!

Just two weeks ago I was still in the position of needing about $6,000 to return to the Philippines. I am now only needing $3,100!! Pretty crazy if you ask me! While I often find support raising to be the hardest part of this whole journey, it is also very exciting. Every day I live in the reality that God's provision is so great. I will continue to trust that the remainder will be provided, and again that the last set of fees in Feb will also be provided. He is faithful :)

If you are interested in supporting my work as a missionary midwife in the Philippines, you can click the donate button to the right.
OR
You can also go to the GoFundMe page set up by my wonderful Aunt!
 http://www.gofundme.com/b28avs.

AND
If you would like to read a great story about a birth I had the privilege of being a part of, check out www.gthemidwife.com


Until next time,
A

Unswervingly, but not.

Over the past week, I feel as though I have somehow been brought back to the place I was in last time this year. Last year, when I was preparing to move to the Philippines and start this journey, I was so excited, hopeful, and invested in the road ahead, but I also struggled with quite a bit of doubt. I had $15,000 to raise in 3 months. A task that seemed impossible. I often felt very overwhelmed by that number and it was a challenge to live in faith that this would come to fruition. I am again feeling very challenged by this task, even though the number is now a smaller $6,500 left to raise for this semester. I wish I could say that I always trust completely that I will again see provision and will be able to go back to finish this task, but honestly, I don't. I'm human. My faith falters. Doubt creeps in. Distrust overwhelms.

As I was driving into the Soo from my sister's house 20 minutes outside of town the other day, I was hit with the idea of “what if I can't go back?”. My heart broke and I sobbed as I drove. That was a thought I hadn't faced in a long time, yet it was still hiding somewhere deep in my mind. After the tears and hysterics dried up (thankfully before I got into town and looked like the crazy crying lady in my car), I was able to come to peace in the fact that whatever reality I face in the next few months, it does not change who God is. Doesn't change that he is faithful. Doesn't change that he provides. Doesn't change that he is in control. Doesn't change that I can trust him. The only thing that changes is that I, again and again, learn to live in surrender knowing that his plan is greater.

Daily I am challenged to trust that provision will come. I am always facing my own kind of impossible. It's not comfortable, and it sure isn't fun. But it is stretching, it's character building, and it is so darn amazing when the “impossible” is proven wrong. I woke up this morning determined to live in the possibility rather than not and came across this verse:

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.

Hebrews 10:23

Unswervingly can be an intense word. I feel a lot more swervingly than un. However, I can hold to the fact that he who promised is faithful. Unswerving means to remain constant and steady. Constant and steady, regardless of the uncertainty surrounding me. Challenging? yes. But through Christ and him alone - possible.

 

I have always promised myself that in walking this journey of support raising, living in the Philippines, serving God on the mission field he has placed me in, and learning to practically share the love of Christ through midwifery care, that I would be honest and transparent. This is what that looks like. I'm not always together, my faith isn't always strong, life isn't perfect - surprise surprise :) But, it is GOOD, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Where it's at:
In order to go back to the Philippines to continue serving and finish my training, I need to raise $6,500 still. That is $1,500 down from my semester goal of $8,000. This is due on Aug 1st. The next fees, of $8,000 again, will be due on Feb 1, 2015. It's a long road ahead, and I know that. But every cent has been provided before and I am believing it will again.
If you are interested in partnering with me, any amount goes a long way! Just click the donate button to the right and let me know if you have any questions. If you would like to chat more about the work being done, I would be more than happy to do so!


Thanks for reading, friends!

A